the nature of life is absolutely full…... full of experience.... full of moment to moment change.... loaded with endless potential….... full of PROMISE……
are you?
This is the question I have been pondering for the last few days…
I have discovered this..... when fullness disappears, somewhere I am avoiding experience…..... I am avoiding life….... or, to be more precise, I am avoiding death…...
I have exposed this.....when I hang on to some idea of who I am to avoid the nothing space of death…..... I become dull…..lose my sparkle..... the radiance of feminine flow.... the clarity of presence... the passion of purpose...
I have revealed this….....the mystery of who I am becoming has to be free and open..... naked….....untainted by concepts.... abandoned to this moment alone..... such a fine line between harvesting the wisdom gathered from experience.....which is evolution......and hanging on like grim death to a ‘me’ story... the poor me... the wrong me...... the in control me.... even the purpose-full ecstatic me....
sure, our stories make us who we are ..... at one level…life’s furnace transmuting the base metal of humanness into soul’s gold..... yet when I find the story too appealing..... irresistible to my need for identity.... the moment of wisdom loses its gold to become dry and dull.... its juice not fed by new life streams of potential and promise....by the calling to explore life's promise... to step over the edge... beyond the boundary.... into the unknown zone..... by the letting go to more..... more experience....perhaps experience not of my choosing..... yet more pain...... in the service of heart opening vulnerability..... more surrender.... in the promise of what?..... death… oh no, not again… can I do this again?...... why me?...... but I want… but I need…..
yet I am asked….. in the ceaseless renewal of soul embodied on earth...... to empty out.... to fill up.... to empty out... to be free... to be truly who I am..... full... so full.... yet utterly empty.... for moment to moment change.... loaded with endless potential..... full of PROMISE
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